Marriage is a dish best served prayerfully. As a natural demonstration of the supernatural love that Christ has for His church, the Holy Spirit is ready and waiting to help us as we journey along with our spouse. Marriage is one of the main ways that God makes us more like his Son – it is fertile soil for grace, patience, mercy, forgiveness and countless more fruits of the Spirit to be produced.

No marriage is perfect – but many of the healthiest marriages that I’ve observed are the ones where prayer is central. It’s really hard to bicker with someone that you just finished praying for.

Here’s 3 suggestions for things that you’ll never regret regularly praying for in your marriage:

KINDNESS

One of my favourite movie moments is this clip from Richard Curtis’ (master of the rom-com) film ‘About Time’. Tim has agonised over who to make his best man and eventually realises that it must be his Dad. His Dad’s speech is touching and finishes with an profound thought: kindness is a hugely underrated quality. The more I value kindness, the more I realise that I’m (often) lacking in it. It doesn’t matter as much what I say, as how I say it. Being right but being unkind is ultimately being wrong. Asking for the fruit of kindness is never a waste of time.

OPEN EYES

The phrase “blind spot” is never more relevant than in a marriage. It’s so easy to see what it wrong with your spouse and so difficult to see what needs correcting in you. Tim Keller says that a successful marriage is possible when each person resolves to treat their sin and selfishness as the main problem. That kind of insight needs the Holy Spirit.

PROTECTION

The devil is opposed to marriage. He tried to divide the first marriage – Adam and Eve – and he has not evolved his strategy since. Marriage represents the love of Christ in a way that he simply cannot stand. With that in mind, we do well to ask for protection against the one who comes to “steal, kill and destroy”. Christian marriage is a force for tremendous good; it needs protecting and strengthening as much as possible.